Examen
Here’s something that might make reflection on this year easier for you. The Daily Examen is an ancient prayer technique that was very important to St. Ignatius and is still used today by many Christians. Traditionally the prayer is done at the end of each day. Here’s how it works:
First, find someplace relatively still and quiet - somewhere you can settle in with the Holy Spirit. Breathe. Become aware of the presence of God with you, and ask for clarity as you proceed in reviewing your day.
Next, think back to the moment you woke up and begin walking through your day with God. What happened? What was something that made you happy? What made you upset? Were there any situations that you could have handled differently? Who did you interact with? Don’t forget to express gratitude for seemingly insignificant things - whenever I do the Examen, my morning cup of coffee always ends up being something I thank God for. Make sure you’re paying close attention to the emotions you felt throughout the day. What is God telling you through these emotions? For instance - if you notice that you were feeling frustrated, might God be asking you to reevaluate your situation or remove yourself from the root of that frustration?
Third, pick one aspect of the day to which you feel drawn. It may be a moment over which you feel a great deal of conviction. It may be something great that happened, or it might be something about which you feel awful. Spend a few moments talking to God about this event in very specific detail; let your heart speak for you.
Lastly, think about tomorrow. Are you feeling anxious about something that is coming up? Are you excited? Ask God to give you clarity throughout the day, so that you may face whatever comes with hope and faith.
Though the Examen is meant to be practiced each evening, I find it helpful for reflection in general. For our purposes we can use the Examen to reflect upon this last liturgical year. Think back, as best as you can, to last Christmas. What parts of the Advent season were your favorite? What was sad or made you feel angry? Who do you remember seeing, and why does your interaction with them stick out to you? How do you think God was moving in that season?
Move on to January. Think of all the plans you made, all your hopes for the year. And February - the cold and rain, do you remember? How were you feeling? How was God moving? Where can you point to the presence of God in those days? Continue to walk through the year in this way.
“Finally, think about next year. How do you feel about what’s coming? Are you hopeful, or are you feeling wary? Lay all of this before God. Ask for guidance and peace. ”
Pick one part of this year - for me, it would be the day that Margot was born. It was just a normal day up until about 4pm, when all of a sudden the doctor said it was time for a c-section - a decision that left me feeling conflicted. Excited to meet Margot, finally, but very sad about a disrupted birth plan. How was God moving through that experience? What was it that God was trying to tell me about my plans, vs. God’s plans? How did God show up in the form of the nurses and doctors, the CNA’s, the sweet, fun, energetic lady who came to sweep my hospital room floor each morning? Thank God for the moment you picked - be it good or bad. Ask for healing if it’s needed - ask for clarity.
Finally, think about next year. How do you feel about what’s coming? Are you hopeful, or are you feeling wary? Lay all of this before God. Ask for guidance and peace. Ask for reassurance that God will be with you every step of the way, as we walk boldly and blindly into our next year.
I hope this practice is something that you find helpful when thinking through this liturgical year and perhaps while thinking through your day.
Thanks be to God who is with us through it all.
